Good thing I worked 11 hours at the office yesterday, or I might have just been fired for what happened.
Normally, when I say I'm "late", I mean I walk into the office around 9:15am. Not a big deal, especially since I work until 7pm every single day. Today I was very, very late. Traffic/commute took an unprecedented, unbelievable 2.25 hours. 2.25 hours for a one-way, morning commute!!! I could have biked the 20-something miles and gotten there faster.
While sitting in the car, I contemplated how much I hated life because of this ridiculous commute on top of already ridiculous hours. My soul is slowly dying. Death by Corporate America, fun stuff.
I seriously was about to have a complete mental breakdown/meltdown in the car. Currently: 30+ unread emails in my Outlook Inbox. I hate Outlook and Excel and life. Maybe unemployment/food stamps/homelessness wouldn't be as bad.
Thursday, October 7, 2010
Tuesday, October 5, 2010
How is it only Tuesday??
Minor Complaint: The office is usually freezing, even when it's 95 degrees outside. Today, the heat was turned on and it was really hot. Too bad I was dressed for the cold office.
I always emails things over for approval before sending them out to the client, just to cover myself in case anything goes wrong. It seems to be not helping, because most people are too busy to go over the document with a microscope, so there's bound to be issues eventually. I guess this is one of those "all in a day's work" type of things. No point wasting more time dwelling on it.
On a positive note, today there was barely any traffic! My commute to work only took 50 minutes. 50 minutes!!
My body is so tired of the long days. SO. EXHAUSTED. My back hurts from sitting in the same exact position all day. My eyeballs feel like they're about to dry up and fall out of their sockets from staring at the computer morning to night. That's it; I'm definitely going back to school eventually. Hopefully, I will get in somewhere nearby and eventually be able to find a passion/career.
Again, everything about this job would be fine if I only liked what I'm doing. The environment, people, etc. are good.
I always emails things over for approval before sending them out to the client, just to cover myself in case anything goes wrong. It seems to be not helping, because most people are too busy to go over the document with a microscope, so there's bound to be issues eventually. I guess this is one of those "all in a day's work" type of things. No point wasting more time dwelling on it.
On a positive note, today there was barely any traffic! My commute to work only took 50 minutes. 50 minutes!!
My body is so tired of the long days. SO. EXHAUSTED. My back hurts from sitting in the same exact position all day. My eyeballs feel like they're about to dry up and fall out of their sockets from staring at the computer morning to night. That's it; I'm definitely going back to school eventually. Hopefully, I will get in somewhere nearby and eventually be able to find a passion/career.
Again, everything about this job would be fine if I only liked what I'm doing. The environment, people, etc. are good.
Monday, October 4, 2010
At what point do you decide a job is just not right for you?
Another Monday. Must get used to things going wrong, because that's what work is all about.
So I had asked someone how to change something in our system and was told an incorrect procedure. Just to be safe, we decided to email headquarters to notify them of the change. Today, headquarters has come back saying that I had failed to notify them of the change because I didn't follow the correct procedure. I don't know if my email had gone ignored, or someone decided to pretend to ignore it so it'll look like they had "caught" my error. YAY!
Of course, each time the you've-screwed-up email is CC'd to a bunch of superiors. I guess I'll just constantly have to take the fall despite whatever I'm told or taught!!
I like this company and the people, but...... I'm not a good fit for the position and I want out.
So I had asked someone how to change something in our system and was told an incorrect procedure. Just to be safe, we decided to email headquarters to notify them of the change. Today, headquarters has come back saying that I had failed to notify them of the change because I didn't follow the correct procedure. I don't know if my email had gone ignored, or someone decided to pretend to ignore it so it'll look like they had "caught" my error. YAY!
Of course, each time the you've-screwed-up email is CC'd to a bunch of superiors. I guess I'll just constantly have to take the fall despite whatever I'm told or taught!!
I like this company and the people, but...... I'm not a good fit for the position and I want out.
Tuesday, September 28, 2010
Terrible Traffic Ticket Tuesday
Late to work again! However, the company's employee manual officially says that 9:30 is the latest you can show up, so technically...
Sigh. I got waved over for a traffic ticket this morning. The police literally stepped in front of my car and waved me aside because we were stuck at a standstill. What happened was this: all of the cars were merrily inching along as I passed through an intersection. Suddenly, the car in front of me stopped. I inched forward as much as possible and checked to make sure I wasn't stuck in the intersection. I looked back and the three cars behind me were all parked in the intersection. I figured I was safe because most of my car was out of the intersection, and I wasn't blocking any traffic. Then, I spotted two policmen staring at me intently from the side of the road. Maybe one of my lights had gone out? They walked into the middle of the jammed traffic and waved for me and the three cars behind me to pull aside. There seemed to be a moment of disagreement between them as to whether I needed to pull over or not. In the end, all three or four of us got ticketed. Wait, when had the light turned red??
This is my 4th or 5th FML moment over the past 2.5 weeks.
I really need to move to New York (City) so I'll never have to drive again.
Sigh. I got waved over for a traffic ticket this morning. The police literally stepped in front of my car and waved me aside because we were stuck at a standstill. What happened was this: all of the cars were merrily inching along as I passed through an intersection. Suddenly, the car in front of me stopped. I inched forward as much as possible and checked to make sure I wasn't stuck in the intersection. I looked back and the three cars behind me were all parked in the intersection. I figured I was safe because most of my car was out of the intersection, and I wasn't blocking any traffic. Then, I spotted two policmen staring at me intently from the side of the road. Maybe one of my lights had gone out? They walked into the middle of the jammed traffic and waved for me and the three cars behind me to pull aside. There seemed to be a moment of disagreement between them as to whether I needed to pull over or not. In the end, all three or four of us got ticketed. Wait, when had the light turned red??
This is my 4th or 5th FML moment over the past 2.5 weeks.
I really need to move to New York (City) so I'll never have to drive again.
Monday, September 27, 2010
I Hate Mondays!
And not just because it's Monday. The past two weeks have been bad. If you recall, last Monday I got into my first ever fender-bender. It took the rest of the week to get that relatively sorted out.
Today (another Monday) it rained. Just to ensure I'd get to work on time, I left the house 20 minutes earlier than usual. However, I ended up being 10 minutes late. My commute turned out to be 1 hour and 30 minutes, up from the usual 1 hour!! It was frustrating.
Anyway, I open up Outlook and there are a bunch of new emails (no surprise there). One email is from the international headquarters saying I did something wrong and a client's order didn't get processed properly. I double-check. Wait... I did exactly as I had been taught/told. I even have the notes from multiple days to prove it. This is why it really sucks to be the intern or the newbie. You always go out of your way to follow directions exactly--double-checking your work, even triple-checking, and then someone else comes along and tells you that you've screwed up. It sucks. *See latest update below.*
I'm pretty sure I work more than both of my parents at their respective full-time jobs. I spend more than 12 hours a day going to work, working, eating lunch at my desk while working, and driving home from work. Oh, and my parents want to take my entire life savings to buy a house that we can't afford.
End of rant. (For now, at least.)
*Update:* Apparently, now my notes on the exact same procedure from two different days were WRONG. I definitely wrote down everything I heard and even asked questions to clarify this. The problem is that most people are usually too busy to pay attention when the intern/newbie asks a question and just brush it aside with a "Yeah, 'kay."
And then when you do exactly as they say, and an issue arises, they inform you: "The next time you don't understand something, please ask me." (I'm mixing/combining all of my internship/work experiences when I say this.)
I want to retire. NOW. At the ripe old age of 21.
Today (another Monday) it rained. Just to ensure I'd get to work on time, I left the house 20 minutes earlier than usual. However, I ended up being 10 minutes late. My commute turned out to be 1 hour and 30 minutes, up from the usual 1 hour!! It was frustrating.
Anyway, I open up Outlook and there are a bunch of new emails (no surprise there). One email is from the international headquarters saying I did something wrong and a client's order didn't get processed properly. I double-check. Wait... I did exactly as I had been taught/told. I even have the notes from multiple days to prove it. This is why it really sucks to be the intern or the newbie. You always go out of your way to follow directions exactly--double-checking your work, even triple-checking, and then someone else comes along and tells you that you've screwed up. It sucks. *See latest update below.*
I'm pretty sure I work more than both of my parents at their respective full-time jobs. I spend more than 12 hours a day going to work, working, eating lunch at my desk while working, and driving home from work. Oh, and my parents want to take my entire life savings to buy a house that we can't afford.
End of rant. (For now, at least.)
*Update:* Apparently, now my notes on the exact same procedure from two different days were WRONG. I definitely wrote down everything I heard and even asked questions to clarify this. The problem is that most people are usually too busy to pay attention when the intern/newbie asks a question and just brush it aside with a "Yeah, 'kay."
And then when you do exactly as they say, and an issue arises, they inform you: "The next time you don't understand something, please ask me." (I'm mixing/combining all of my internship/work experiences when I say this.)
I want to retire. NOW. At the ripe old age of 21.
Friday, September 24, 2010
"Happy" Hour?
Happy hour after work. I didn't really want to go out drinking, but I knew I should show up anyway. It started off awkward because I was trying to avoid ordering anything with alcohol in it. I had a long drive home to look forward to and didn't want to risk another driving infraction in the same week. After I spent 5 minutes closely examining the menu, a coworker reassured me that the drinks were very watered down. I found it weird seeing the alcohol loosen up coworkers. And then once the alcohol is served, everyone has to take turns sharing funny stories--mostly about alcohol. It turned out to be kind of fun, but I really wonder if it's a good idea for people who see each other 50 hours a week to blur the line between their work and personal lives.
Some of the people wanted to go bar-hopping tomorrow night but I said I'll have to pass. I'm not really into binge drinking, and there's still the issue of driving home afterwards.
It turned out that the drinks weren't really that watered down. I only had one, but still felt it go to my head. After we said our good-byes, I pretended to walk to my car but instead ducked into a movie theater nearby. The movie I saw happened to about the place I used to live and "work". It brought up all of my old regrets about life, work, etc. to the surface. What a bummer (but a good movie anyhow).
Some of the people wanted to go bar-hopping tomorrow night but I said I'll have to pass. I'm not really into binge drinking, and there's still the issue of driving home afterwards.
It turned out that the drinks weren't really that watered down. I only had one, but still felt it go to my head. After we said our good-byes, I pretended to walk to my car but instead ducked into a movie theater nearby. The movie I saw happened to about the place I used to live and "work". It brought up all of my old regrets about life, work, etc. to the surface. What a bummer (but a good movie anyhow).
Thursday, September 23, 2010
What's the point??
I'm about to give a recount of the horrible week I had.
But first, what is the point of work, really? Is it:
a) Sitting in rush hour traffic for 2 hours a day
b) Squinting at a computer screen for 9-10 hours a day
c) Having no time for breakfast
d) Having no time for lunch
e) Eating dinner alone at 9pm in front of your laptop
f) All of the above
It's 7:30pm. Time to go home for the day. I grab my car keys and pack up the company laptop. I'm about to leave when I remember something. I quickly scribble a note onto a yellow Post-It, and I'm off. Even though the sun has set, it's still warm out. When I reach my [parent's] car, I realize I had left my keys on my desk. No worries; I'll just go back in to get it. Maybe one of the cleaning staff will have the keys. I step into the elevators and press the floor number of the office. Hmmm, it won't light up. Press again. And again. And again. A guy with a briefcase steps out of the elevator next to mine. Ugh, the elevators must be on lock-down and won't take people up. A janitor nearby explains that they don't have the office keys. I think about calling my parents to pick me up, except I had left my cell phone at home. I wander around for a bit outside before going into a hotel and asking to borrow their phone. I call home. My mom picks up. I explain that she needs bring my car keys, and preferably leave as soon as possible (it's an hour-long drive). She mutters something about being tired from working all day but agrees: we will meet in front of a restaurant in one hour.
I order dinner at a fast-food place and eat it slowly. I figure the hour must be up (I don't have a watch either). I wait outside. Maybe my mom took the wrong exit on the highway? An entire hour passes. The restaurant-goers stare at me as they walk by. Finally, I borrow someone's phone and call home, and both parents' cell phones; no one picks up. It's completely dark out and I'm starting to panic. About 20 minutes later, my mom shows randomly in the middle of the parking lot nearby. Apparently, she had stopped to ask for directions, and then had locked her keys in the car. Someone had finally given her a ride to the restaurant. I laugh hysterically.
We walk back to the hotel, and then to a gas station nearby. My mom finally manages to convince someone to take us home to get the spare keys. He was reluctant at first, but generously let us drive his car and even refused the money we tried to give him. 2 hours later, my mom and I can finally get into our cars and get home. I finally drift off to sleep after 3am.
My mom is yelling at me from downstairs to wake up. It's 8:30am and I've overslept. She slams the front door shut and leaves for work. Why didn't she wake me up earlier? Oh well, no time to think about that. I'm super late. I finally walk into work about an hour late. I mumble the usual greetings and an apology about being so late. I reach to turn on my laptop when I realize with horror that my work laptop was left at home. I run outside to clear my head. Maybe I could go back to get it and no one would notice? There's no chance of that happening, since my desk is only a few feet away from most of my superiors. I go back in and confess that I had forgotten my laptop at home. Can I borrow another laptop? Apparently not; each laptop computer can only be accessed by the employee it was formatted for. Frantic calls to the international headquarters ensue. I imagine myself being fired for this. Eventually, another laptop is set up. Overwhelming relief.
Over the weekend, one of our cars needs to get fixed. The family cars are shuffled around and I'm stuck with the family clunker for the rest of the week. The clunker does not go above 60 miles per hour without trembling furiously, which is a pretty scary experience when you're driving on the interstate. (By the way, I work out-of-state.) The driver's side window is broken, and I will have to open the whole door when I pull up to the toll booths (I need to go through 4 toll booths a day). The clunker is so low to the ground that I always feel like I'm sitting directly on the pavement when I'm doing shoulder-checks. Monday morning rolls around and I'm off to work driving the clunker. I'm running a bit late and the traffic is absolutely horrible--several miles of snail-paced driving. The cars in my lane are at a complete standstill, when the lane next to mine starts moving. I wait patiently for a large gap and try to merge into it. A sudden, loud crashing sound makes me nearly jump out of my skin. My car had hit the car in front of me. I duck my head in shame and spend a brief moment utterly hating life. Then I pull to the side and pray for little damage. There's little damage (yay!). I feel horrible, but the other driver, a stay-at-home-mom, is very nice about the whole situation. I apologize and she takes down my information. I'm anxious to get to work on time. I take the sheet with her phone number on it and we both leave.
An hour and a half later, my dad calls. Multiple times in a row. It's the insurance company calling to say I had hit someone, and she had reported suffering neck pain. WHAT, neck pain!??? A few more moments of hating my fortune/fate. The insurance company calls me. I can't answer it in front of the bosses. I call back, but the agent is out to lunch. The agent eventually gets impatient and files the claim without my input. I figure it's the end of things.
Today, my dad calls again at work. I check my phone and see 4 missed calls. He's calling about the insurance company again. They need to send someone to come take pictures of the damage on my car/clunker. I groan. My dad suggests it's because the woman is trying to get a claim for injuries as the result of our fender bender. I hang up before my dad's done talking because I don't want to seem like I'm wasting time making personal calls in front of the superiors. My dad leaves an angry voicemail about how I'm disrespectful and ungrateful, and that he's never helping me with anything again for the rest of my life.
And now here we are. I got to leave early today, meaning before 7pm. Things were starting to look up in life before this awful week and insurance nightmare. I wish school could have prepared me for how much the real world is going to suck.
I want to retire now. Work would be bearable if everything else in life was perfect. Ugh, I just can't deal with this.
But first, what is the point of work, really? Is it:
a) Sitting in rush hour traffic for 2 hours a day
b) Squinting at a computer screen for 9-10 hours a day
c) Having no time for breakfast
d) Having no time for lunch
e) Eating dinner alone at 9pm in front of your laptop
f) All of the above
It's 7:30pm. Time to go home for the day. I grab my car keys and pack up the company laptop. I'm about to leave when I remember something. I quickly scribble a note onto a yellow Post-It, and I'm off. Even though the sun has set, it's still warm out. When I reach my [parent's] car, I realize I had left my keys on my desk. No worries; I'll just go back in to get it. Maybe one of the cleaning staff will have the keys. I step into the elevators and press the floor number of the office. Hmmm, it won't light up. Press again. And again. And again. A guy with a briefcase steps out of the elevator next to mine. Ugh, the elevators must be on lock-down and won't take people up. A janitor nearby explains that they don't have the office keys. I think about calling my parents to pick me up, except I had left my cell phone at home. I wander around for a bit outside before going into a hotel and asking to borrow their phone. I call home. My mom picks up. I explain that she needs bring my car keys, and preferably leave as soon as possible (it's an hour-long drive). She mutters something about being tired from working all day but agrees: we will meet in front of a restaurant in one hour.
I order dinner at a fast-food place and eat it slowly. I figure the hour must be up (I don't have a watch either). I wait outside. Maybe my mom took the wrong exit on the highway? An entire hour passes. The restaurant-goers stare at me as they walk by. Finally, I borrow someone's phone and call home, and both parents' cell phones; no one picks up. It's completely dark out and I'm starting to panic. About 20 minutes later, my mom shows randomly in the middle of the parking lot nearby. Apparently, she had stopped to ask for directions, and then had locked her keys in the car. Someone had finally given her a ride to the restaurant. I laugh hysterically.
We walk back to the hotel, and then to a gas station nearby. My mom finally manages to convince someone to take us home to get the spare keys. He was reluctant at first, but generously let us drive his car and even refused the money we tried to give him. 2 hours later, my mom and I can finally get into our cars and get home. I finally drift off to sleep after 3am.
My mom is yelling at me from downstairs to wake up. It's 8:30am and I've overslept. She slams the front door shut and leaves for work. Why didn't she wake me up earlier? Oh well, no time to think about that. I'm super late. I finally walk into work about an hour late. I mumble the usual greetings and an apology about being so late. I reach to turn on my laptop when I realize with horror that my work laptop was left at home. I run outside to clear my head. Maybe I could go back to get it and no one would notice? There's no chance of that happening, since my desk is only a few feet away from most of my superiors. I go back in and confess that I had forgotten my laptop at home. Can I borrow another laptop? Apparently not; each laptop computer can only be accessed by the employee it was formatted for. Frantic calls to the international headquarters ensue. I imagine myself being fired for this. Eventually, another laptop is set up. Overwhelming relief.
Over the weekend, one of our cars needs to get fixed. The family cars are shuffled around and I'm stuck with the family clunker for the rest of the week. The clunker does not go above 60 miles per hour without trembling furiously, which is a pretty scary experience when you're driving on the interstate. (By the way, I work out-of-state.) The driver's side window is broken, and I will have to open the whole door when I pull up to the toll booths (I need to go through 4 toll booths a day). The clunker is so low to the ground that I always feel like I'm sitting directly on the pavement when I'm doing shoulder-checks. Monday morning rolls around and I'm off to work driving the clunker. I'm running a bit late and the traffic is absolutely horrible--several miles of snail-paced driving. The cars in my lane are at a complete standstill, when the lane next to mine starts moving. I wait patiently for a large gap and try to merge into it. A sudden, loud crashing sound makes me nearly jump out of my skin. My car had hit the car in front of me. I duck my head in shame and spend a brief moment utterly hating life. Then I pull to the side and pray for little damage. There's little damage (yay!). I feel horrible, but the other driver, a stay-at-home-mom, is very nice about the whole situation. I apologize and she takes down my information. I'm anxious to get to work on time. I take the sheet with her phone number on it and we both leave.
An hour and a half later, my dad calls. Multiple times in a row. It's the insurance company calling to say I had hit someone, and she had reported suffering neck pain. WHAT, neck pain!??? A few more moments of hating my fortune/fate. The insurance company calls me. I can't answer it in front of the bosses. I call back, but the agent is out to lunch. The agent eventually gets impatient and files the claim without my input. I figure it's the end of things.
Today, my dad calls again at work. I check my phone and see 4 missed calls. He's calling about the insurance company again. They need to send someone to come take pictures of the damage on my car/clunker. I groan. My dad suggests it's because the woman is trying to get a claim for injuries as the result of our fender bender. I hang up before my dad's done talking because I don't want to seem like I'm wasting time making personal calls in front of the superiors. My dad leaves an angry voicemail about how I'm disrespectful and ungrateful, and that he's never helping me with anything again for the rest of my life.
And now here we are. I got to leave early today, meaning before 7pm. Things were starting to look up in life before this awful week and insurance nightmare. I wish school could have prepared me for how much the real world is going to suck.
I want to retire now. Work would be bearable if everything else in life was perfect. Ugh, I just can't deal with this.
Tuesday, August 17, 2010
Cold Calling
Today I had to make a few cold calls to various companies. Obviously, none of them worked out. They were quite painful to make, and I can't imagine doing this full-time.
I'm worried that I may end up having to do cold calls eventually. Recruiters often try to push marketing majors into sales. Of course, if I were actually great at selling, I would've skipped college and went straight into sales.
Sunday, August 15, 2010
The Student Loan Company, Part II
Continued from "The Evil Student Loan Company" (which is no longer available).
Apparently, I graduated from college with over $20,000 of student loans. And, I didn't realize that until this week. Haha! College-Degree-Fail. :P
In my defense, one of the loan agencies had not contacted me until now, an entire year later. I finally went back to my school to get all my financial records.
Apparently, I graduated from college with over $20,000 of student loans. And, I didn't realize that until this week. Haha! College-Degree-Fail. :P
In my defense, one of the loan agencies had not contacted me until now, an entire year later. I finally went back to my school to get all my financial records.
Wednesday, August 11, 2010
Part-time vs. Full-time
"Americans aged 18 to 29 had easily the highest underemployment rate in July of any age group, at 28.4%, including 11.8% who were unemployed and 16.6% who were employed part time but wanted full-time work. Among all U.S. adults in the workforce, a higher percentage of women than of men are underemployed."
I'm currently applying for a job that's more like this:
If I somehow get this job, should I even consider accepting?? (There's no overtime, of course, but having health insurance is tempting.) I'm hoping it's going to be no more than 60 hours at the office per week, but the industry average works out to around 80. 50 hours sounds like a dream come true.
Of course, I could just go do something else if I don't mind spending the rest of my life broke. There's always the parents' basement.
Tuesday, August 10, 2010
The real problem here
Online commenter:
"I disagree with your insinuation that wanting a job with decent pay and benefits is some kind of selfish materialism. The real problem here is that our middle class is shrinking, and the income gap between the top 20% and everyone else is enormous — and yet it's the remaining 80% of people at the bottom who keep getting asked to make some sacrifices and quit being so materialistic."
So true.
Wednesday, August 4, 2010
Prayer does wonders
I'm still hoping everything works out. Not to get all religious on you, but praying works wonders. It definitely picked me up from the lowest of my unemployment-lows. I promised myself (and God) that I would do a post on the benefits of prayer if things worked out. And here it is.
I pretty much gave up on the job hunt and stumbled upon my last few interviews by chance. For one of them, I had a sudden urge to browse my school's job board. Everything that has happened recently has been a miracle.
That said, I'm currently still waiting... for what, I'm not sure. One of the things that scares me the most about the "real world" is job-related stress. I'm fine with deadlines, but the constant grind and daily beating associated with some jobs/industries terrifies me. I've heard horror stories of how bad it can get: 100+ hour workweeks, the constant fear of messing up/losing your job/embarrassing your firm, hating waking up every morning, or worse, not being given the chance to wake up at all because you were pulling an all-nighter. (Excuse the poor grammar.) Fortunately, 95% of jobs aren't like that. However, due to the recession, many employers are now hinting that 40-hour weeks are a thing of the past. Going above-and-beyond the call of duty is no longer the exception it's in the job description, literally.
I hope I have a job after all of this is done. Something that I will enjoy waking up for.
I pretty much gave up on the job hunt and stumbled upon my last few interviews by chance. For one of them, I had a sudden urge to browse my school's job board. Everything that has happened recently has been a miracle.
That said, I'm currently still waiting... for what, I'm not sure. One of the things that scares me the most about the "real world" is job-related stress. I'm fine with deadlines, but the constant grind and daily beating associated with some jobs/industries terrifies me. I've heard horror stories of how bad it can get: 100+ hour workweeks, the constant fear of messing up/losing your job/embarrassing your firm, hating waking up every morning, or worse, not being given the chance to wake up at all because you were pulling an all-nighter. (Excuse the poor grammar.) Fortunately, 95% of jobs aren't like that. However, due to the recession, many employers are now hinting that 40-hour weeks are a thing of the past. Going above-and-beyond the call of duty is no longer the exception
I hope I have a job after all of this is done. Something that I will enjoy waking up for.
Crazy Week
I've been following several unemployment blogs for months. Eventually, you'll reach the post where the blogger writes: "This is an awkward situation in the context of this blog, but I've finally found a job!"
Maybe that's why I started this blog? Hoping I could soon join their employed ranks once my incessant complaining gets released into the depths of the blogosphere? LOL.
I would hate to do that to you, dear readers. I must mention that I got lucky and have been on two interviews within the past month. During each interview, it was painfully obvious that I lack experience and have a very shallow understanding of the respective industry. But both times, the interviewers seemed to have developed a decent impression of me.
Okay, enough blathering: I finally may have gotten a job offer. I think I panicked in the moment and mumbled a lower salary than is average for the industry. My mind is still reeling from everything that's been going on.
Anyway, I have no clue what I'm supposed to do now. What should I do if I get the job? The idea of working terrifies me! What do I do next if I don't? I can't focus on anything anymore... I guess I'll go pray for things to work out. I have no idea what "things" I'm referring to nor what "working out" means.
Random: I think I might have gotten my first bed bug bite. (Thankfully, I got it when traveling over the last two days so it was not from my home.)
I would hate to do that to you, dear readers. I must mention that I got lucky and have been on two interviews within the past month. During each interview, it was painfully obvious that I lack experience and have a very shallow understanding of the respective industry. But both times, the interviewers seemed to have developed a decent impression of me.
Okay, enough blathering: I finally may have gotten a job offer. I think I panicked in the moment and mumbled a lower salary than is average for the industry. My mind is still reeling from everything that's been going on.
Anyway, I have no clue what I'm supposed to do now. What should I do if I get the job? The idea of working terrifies me! What do I do next if I don't? I can't focus on anything anymore... I guess I'll go pray for things to work out. I have no idea what "things" I'm referring to nor what "working out" means.
Random: I think I might have gotten my first bed bug bite. (Thankfully, I got it when traveling over the last two days
Thursday, July 29, 2010
How to Name-Drop Your Way Into an Interview
Are you a recent college graduate with no work experience and no employment prospects? Don't worry! Follow the steps below and you'll be interviewing in no time.
*Disclaimer: This advice may not be practical for everyone. And it probably won't help you find lasting employment.
Step 1: Attend college. Take out as many loans as you need to (as long as you don't mind working as an indentured servant for the next 30 years of your life). The more loans you have to take out, the more interviewers and prospective employers will take pity on you. This doesn't mean they want to hire you, but they may decide to interview you just to satisfy their curiosity. Your tuition was HOW much?! HA! I bet you have a lot of student loans now! Oh, you want to know more about the position? Err sorry, we're looking to hire someone with a bit more work experience.
Step 1.5: Move back in with your parents.
Step 2: Volunteer. Take an unpaid internship at a well-known firm. See my previous post on Negatively-Paid Internships for more information.
Step 3: Put all of the above on your resume. NEVER voluntarily mention that your internship was unpaid.
Step 4: Try to get hired for a paying, full-time job.
Step 5: Try to get a temp job, a paid internship, or another "prestigious" unpaid internship.
Step 6: Keep applying to full-time jobs. By now, you should be getting a lot of interviews. (The bigger the names on your resume, the more curious hiring managers will be and the more they will want to meet you in person. No, you are still too inexperienced for the position.)
Step 6.5: Try to get hired for a paying, full-time job.
Step 7: Repeat Steps 3 to 6 until you finally give up and just decide to apply to grad school.
Step 8: Finish grad school and go back to Step 1. Replace the word "college" with "grad school". Repeat all the steps.
*Disclaimer: This advice may not be practical for everyone. And it probably won't help you find lasting employment.
Step 1: Attend college. Take out as many loans as you need to (as long as you don't mind working as an indentured servant for the next 30 years of your life). The more loans you have to take out, the more interviewers and prospective employers will take pity on you. This doesn't mean they want to hire you, but they may decide to interview you just to satisfy their curiosity. Your tuition was HOW much?! HA! I bet you have a lot of student loans now! Oh, you want to know more about the position? Err
Step 1.5: Move back in with your parents.
Step 2: Volunteer. Take an unpaid internship at a well-known firm. See my previous post on Negatively-Paid Internships for more information.
Step 3: Put all of the above on your resume. NEVER voluntarily mention that your internship was unpaid.
Step 5: Try to get a temp job, a paid internship, or another "prestigious" unpaid internship.
Step 6: Keep applying to full-time jobs. By now, you should be getting a lot of interviews. (The bigger the names on your resume, the more curious hiring managers will be and the more they will want to meet you in person. No, you are still too inexperienced for the position.)
Step 7: Repeat Steps 3 to 6 until you finally give up and just decide to apply to grad school.
Step 8: Finish grad school and go back to Step 1. Replace the word "college" with "grad school". Repeat all the steps.
Wednesday, July 28, 2010
Trend Alert: Negatively-Paid Internships
I find it ironic that I commanded a higher hourly wage before I graduated than I do now. But that's nothing compared to the time I met an unpaid intern with a master's degree.
A college education opens all kinds of doors
http://snarkwalk.blogspot.com/2010/06/college-education-opens-all-kinds-of.html#comments
I really like Chris's post; it sums up life after college nicely.
Right out of college, I was a negatively-paid intern. Yes, I was one of the few privileged interns nationwide who made even less than unpaid interns. I had to pay $1500 to an internship "agency". In return, they would allow me to work at my "dream" internship. $300 out of that $1500 total went to a small, unknowndiploma mill college to pay for one course credit. Apparently, it's illegal to hire unpaid interns unless they are earning college credit for the experience. And thus, us "unpaid" interns had to pay to work. In addition to the $1500, I had to cover my own rent, food, and travel expenses. To pay for all of this, I had to beg for another loan from the Bank of Mom&Dad
Now you're probably wondering why anyone in their right mind would pay to work. When I signed up for the internship program, my plan was to move to the city and continue to job-hunt. I was really confident that I would be able to land a full-time job within weeks. My college had many contacts and alumni in the area, and I had able to get the occasional interview without too much trouble. Obviously, things did not work out as I had planned.
What surprised me the most during my internship experience was talking to one of my fellow negatively-paid coworkers. Two of the interns at our office were legitimately unpaid interns both were still enrolled in school and didn't have to pay a cent before being hired. The only other intern had fallen for the same scam me; we had both paid the same "agency" to work, and then forked over more of our nonexistent income/savings to cover the sky-high living expenses. However, my fellow negatively-paid coworker had recently earned a master's degree in finance in the United Kingdom. She was the most educated of anyone in the entire office, yet had to spend thousands of dollars to work for free. Not only that, but she actually had experience working at a bank after completing her undergraduate degree in finance.
Our managers enjoyed a major power trip ordering us around for the next several months. (Both were less educated than the master's-degree intern, and one was actually a year younger than her.) Some of the wonderfully educational tasks/responsibilities us interns were assigned included: delivering roses to a random girl my manager wanted to impress (45-minute one-way trip), delivering mail by foot, buying and delivering one of the managers groceries (the intern was subsequently yelled at for getting the wrong type of jam). Despite everything, the internship program was still worth the cost to me, but only because it opened the door to a priceless temporary position at another firm. (In other words, I was able to earn my $1500 back.)
But I still don't understand how a smart, hard-working, and polished individual with a master's degree in finance, plus international work experience, can end up employed. Is there any hope for the rest of us recent grads without any work experience and graduate degrees??
A college education opens all kinds of doors
http://snarkwalk.blogspot.com/2010/06/college-education-opens-all-kinds-of.html#comments
I really like Chris's post; it sums up life after college nicely.
Right out of college, I was a negatively-paid intern. Yes, I was one of the few privileged interns nationwide who made even less than unpaid interns. I had to pay $1500 to an internship "agency". In return, they would allow me to work at my "dream" internship. $300 out of that $1500 total went to a small, unknown
Now you're probably wondering why anyone in their right mind would pay to work. When I signed up for the internship program, my plan was to move to the city and continue to job-hunt. I was really confident that I would be able to land a full-time job within weeks. My college had many contacts and alumni in the area, and I had able to get the occasional interview without too much trouble. Obviously, things did not work out as I had planned.
What surprised me the most during my internship experience was talking to one of my fellow negatively-paid coworkers. Two of the interns at our office were legitimately unpaid interns
Our managers enjoyed a major power trip ordering us around for the next several months. (Both were less educated than the master's-degree intern, and one was actually a year younger than her.) Some of the wonderfully educational tasks/responsibilities us interns were assigned included: delivering roses to a random girl my manager wanted to impress (45-minute one-way trip), delivering mail by foot, buying and delivering one of the managers groceries (the intern was subsequently yelled at for getting the wrong type of jam). Despite everything, the internship program was still worth the cost to me, but only because it opened the door to a priceless temporary position at another firm. (In other words, I was able to earn my $1500 back.)
But I still don't understand how a smart, hard-working, and polished individual with a master's degree in finance, plus international work experience, can end up employed. Is there any hope for the rest of us recent grads without any work experience and graduate degrees??
Depressing Employment Article of the Day
Gen Y: No jobs, lots of loans, grim future
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/38364681/ns/business-economy_at_a_crossroads/?GT1=43001
by Megan L. Thomas
msnbc.com contributor
updated 7/28/2010 8:36:50 AM ET
They are perhaps the best-educated generation ever, but they can’t find jobs. Many face staggering college loans and have moved back in with their parents. Even worse, their difficulty in getting careers launched could set them back financially for years.
The high unemployment rate among young Millennials can affect them financially and psychologically throughout their careers, according to a report by the Joint Economic Committee.
“The 'scarring effects' of prolonged unemployment can be devastating over a worker’s career,” according to the report. “Productivity, earnings and well-being can all suffer. In addition, unemployment can lead to a deterioration of skills and make securing future employment more difficult.”
Competing against older workers with years of experience has put many Millennials on the losing end of job interviews. And while that's typical of past recessions, the long-term unemployment characteristic of this cycle is forcing many older workers to seek jobs that would have gone to younger workers in the past.
Baby boomers also are delaying their retirement, adding to the competition. A quarter of workers postponed their retirement in the past year, with 33 percent of workers now expecting to retire after 65, according to aretirement survey by The Employment Benefit Research Institute.
If they do manage to get hired, younger employees are often the first to be fired in layoffs. And when Millennials do land a job, it probably won’t be as lucrative due to intense competition for jobs. That means that this generation’s potential earning power is likely to lag over the course of their careers.
Friday, July 16, 2010
I hated college
To clarify the title of this blog: I hated college because I ended up unemployed afterwards. In other words, it was a complete waste of time and money from a numbers standpoint. Had I ended up with a good, full-time job instead, I would have convinced myself that I liked college. For me, the end result overpowers everything else (because my college was ridiculously expensive and demanded too many all-nighters).
Excuses, excuses
Am I right to complain??
My only friend who knows my entire backstory thinks I have too many excuses and doesn't want to hear about them anymore. Which is true. However, it's not as easy as it sounds to decide what you want to do in life, learn everything that you can to get there on your own, and then get your dream job.
For example, we were discussing careers in marketing. I was saying I would love to do more brand management and consulting work, as opposed to the communications-based marketing roles that are available at most small and medium companies (i.e. communicating/negotiating with outside vendors, purchasing services and ordering materials, planning events, coordinating mailings and email communications, etc.). Unfortunately, I can't seem to get an entry-level position in any field, so all of this is theoretical (at least for me).
This is the basically how our conversation went:
Me: Most of the creative services at the companies that I've interned at were outsourced to outside marketing firms.
Friend: You should apply to those places then.
Me: I have, but they don't seem to be hiring.
Friend: I've seen lots of those job postings in that area lately.
Me: Those openings are probably in the design area. Unfortunately, I don't know many of those fancy design programs like Dreamweaver, Flash animation, etc.
Friend: Well, learn them.
Me: I can't afford to spend hundreds of dollars on a single program.
Friend: Learn them for free. Go on YouTube and watch the tutorials.
Me: But would that really count towards work experience for a job or even on a resume?
Friend: It would show employers that you are a go-getter. You make too many excuses.
The conversation ended with my friend saying: I don't want to have this conversation anymore.
This is why I have been blogging again--I've run out of people in real life to vent to.
I was talking with my other friend about how I believe the job market has picked up in the metropolitan area near our college. She replied saying nothing much has changed. I point out that everyone we know (including her) has gotten job offers very, very recently. She maintains that hiring hasn't picked up much, not really.
There's this phenomenon in psychology about how people tend to attribute their own failings to external influences, while blaming other people's failings on their own doing. Some may argue that I do it too when I claim I can't find a job by no fault of my own. I truly believe that I've tried absolutely EVERYTHING I could think of.
Examples of this phenomenon:
- "I can't find a job, but it's not my fault because I did everything right."
- "I just found a job, as did all of my friends, but hiring has absolutely not picked up in our area. We just happened to be a bunch of outstanding, highly-qualified candidates."
- "You can't find a job because you're not trying hard enough. Stop using the economy as an excuse."
From Wikipedia:
Self-serving bias: "A self-serving bias occurs when people attribute their successes to internal or personal factors but attribute their failures to situational factors beyond their control. The self-serving bias can be seen in the common human tendency to take credit for success but to deny responsibility for failure."
Fundamental attribution error: "In social psychology, the fundamental attribution error (also known as correspondence bias or attribution effect) describes the tendency to over-value dispositional or personality-based explanations for the observed behaviors of others while under-valuing situational explanations for those behaviors. The fundamental attribution error is most visible when people explain the behavior of others. It does not explain interpretations of one's own behavior—where situational factors are often taken into consideration. This discrepancy is called the actor-observer bias."
Not that I'm saying this has anything to do with my own situation.
Thursday, July 15, 2010
Everything Reminds Me of How We Can No Longer Be Together Anymore
I'm updating from my internship. Which I shouldn't be doing.
Everything reminds me of how my college friends and I are growing apart and are on completely different paths in life. (This is why you shouldn't go to college out-of-state, unless you're determined to settle down in that area after graduation.) I kid you not when I say that EVERYONE who I had been friends with and kept in touch with, however briefly, now has a full-time job. (Is there something wrong with me??) And for 95% of them, not just any job, but an amazing one. A few of them are posed to make over $100,000 in this coming year. And all of them are going into the same handful of firms, in the same metropolitan area. The same metropolitan area which I left behind to seek a wonderful life in the suburbs.
The most triggering word for me is "finance". I wish I had majored in finance instead!! Followed by, in no particular order: "accounting", "marketing", "business school", "college" , "university", "internship", and "diploma". Speaking of diploma, does anyone want to purchase my100% recyclable diploma? I will sell it to you for the low, low price of $51.99, plus shipping and handling. I don't think I need to point out what an amazing deal this is--it costs at least this much to attend one hour of class at my school! Quantities are unlimited, since I can keep ordering replacement diplomas for $50 from my alma mater.
Back to more triggering words/phrases: the name of my college/university, the name of the university I had almost attended instead, the investment bank which I did my unpaid internship at, the investment bank which I did my temp position at, and basically any and all bulge bracket investment banks. Or accounting firms.
I used to think I was the type of person who didn't care about money. I used to believe all that mattered to me was doing what I (supposedly) loved. However, I had not counted on having NO money and NO job prospects. This totally changes the equation.
To summarize:
Doing what you love + earning a liveable income > doing what you hate + misery + earning a hefty income.
Doing what you love + absence of a steady income + misery < doing what you hate + misery + earning a hefty (or any) income.
To further summarize, it's preferable to be employed yet miserable, versus unemployed and still miserable. When you are employed and miserable, you can choose to end your employment at any time. The reverse is not true.
I'm not sure how to describe the exact feeling that the above words/phrases trigger in me. Maybe it feels like when you find out you've won $50,000 in the lottery, but then misplace the ticket. I specifically picked $50,000 to serve two purposes, and you can probably guess what they are.
"But didn't you want to go into marketing?"
I don't think I'm the type of person who does well spending all day on the phone with different people. The type of marketing I had wanted to get into is now out of question (for me) due to the economy. So now marketing at many places involves making arrangements, building contacts, purchasing materials, event planning, etc. It sounds interesting, but quickly becomes draining after you make 20 phone calls to 5 different restaurants just to make a reservation for a single company dinner. And then your company decides to cancel the dinner.
Maybe I should beg my former classmates for help in finding a job. I would also have to beg them to let me sleep on their couch for however long it takes to get a job. One friend of mine thinks this is a good idea. I just can't swallow my pride though. How bad would it be if after all their help, I still can't find a job? One friend and several family friends have already tried their best to help me in my job search, and I still ended up with nothing.
This current stint is my 5th internship.
Everything reminds me of how my college friends and I are growing apart and are on completely different paths in life. (This is why you shouldn't go to college out-of-state, unless you're determined to settle down in that area after graduation.) I kid you not when I say that EVERYONE who I had been friends with and kept in touch with, however briefly, now has a full-time job. (Is there something wrong with me??) And for 95% of them, not just any job, but an amazing one. A few of them are posed to make over $100,000 in this coming year. And all of them are going into the same handful of firms, in the same metropolitan area. The same metropolitan area which I left behind to seek a wonderful life in the suburbs.
The most triggering word for me is "finance". I wish I had majored in finance instead!! Followed by, in no particular order: "accounting", "marketing", "business school", "college" , "university", "internship", and "diploma". Speaking of diploma, does anyone want to purchase my
Back to more triggering words/phrases: the name of my college/university, the name of the university I had almost attended instead, the investment bank which I did my unpaid internship at, the investment bank which I did my temp position at, and basically any and all bulge bracket investment banks. Or accounting firms.
I used to think I was the type of person who didn't care about money. I used to believe all that mattered to me was doing what I (supposedly) loved. However, I had not counted on having NO money and NO job prospects. This totally changes the equation.
To summarize:
Doing what you love + earning a liveable income > doing what you hate + misery + earning a hefty income.
Doing what you love + absence of a steady income + misery < doing what you hate + misery + earning a hefty (or any) income.
To further summarize, it's preferable to be employed yet miserable, versus unemployed and still miserable. When you are employed and miserable, you can choose to end your employment at any time. The reverse is not true.
I'm not sure how to describe the exact feeling that the above words/phrases trigger in me. Maybe it feels like when you find out you've won $50,000 in the lottery, but then misplace the ticket. I specifically picked $50,000 to serve two purposes, and you can probably guess what they are.
"But didn't you want to go into marketing?"
I don't think I'm the type of person who does well spending all day on the phone with different people. The type of marketing I had wanted to get into is now out of question (for me) due to the economy. So now marketing at many places involves making arrangements, building contacts, purchasing materials, event planning, etc. It sounds interesting, but quickly becomes draining after you make 20 phone calls to 5 different restaurants just to make a reservation for a single company dinner. And then your company decides to cancel the dinner.
Maybe I should beg my former classmates for help in finding a job. I would also have to beg them to let me sleep on their couch for however long it takes to get a job. One friend of mine thinks this is a good idea. I just can't swallow my pride though. How bad would it be if after all their help, I still can't find a job? One friend and several family friends have already tried their best to help me in my job search, and I still ended up with nothing.
This current stint is my 5th internship.
Sunday, July 11, 2010
Consequences of Unemployment
I'm bored and decided to update this blog. I spent the past weekend alone and cooped up in front of my laptop on an air mattress. The landlords left for vacation, so I have the house to myself. The time I spent away from blogging has been nice. Instead of dwelling on the past or worrying about the future, I just blocked out the employment issue from my mind. But now that summer is more than halfway over, I should get back to the problem at hand.
But first: unemployment is so lonely and isolating. I feel like it ruined parts of my life that had once been promising, if not perfect. Everything feels so foreign and out of place now that I sometimes feel like I'm dreaming (and not in a good way).
1. Social Life
After moving back with my parents, I was hundreds of miles away from most of my friends. And thus, my social life came to a screeching halt. Not that it was great before--it has been withering since I graduated from college early. But the several months before I graduated from college were utterly amazing. I had several best/close friends at that point, and there was always something fun to do. Unfortunately, I decided to not keep in contact with most of my friends after graduation because I was ashamed about still being unemployed. I figured I would get a job, move back, and everything will go back to being good again. That was over a year ago. Sigh. Now that I've moved out of my parents' house to take on an internship in the middle of nowhere, I have absolutely no one to talk to outside of my internship hours. And I have nothing in common with my college friends anymore. They have all moved on to fancy jobs and the real world. Meanwhile, I'm stuck in unemployment-limbo and have decided that self-imposed isolation is preferable to facing feelings of regret and shame.
2. Family
My parents sometimes treat me like I'm a good-for-nothing freeloader. They are really embarrassed by my being unemployed, so I don't bother going anywhere in public with them. We used to get along, but this unemployment problem has ruined whatever semblance of a relationship we had. My parents are pretty temperamental, and I'll never forgive them for the various insults they've hurled at me over the past several months. And this is all because I couldn't find a job.
3. Financially
The transition from being a broke college student to a broke, unemployed college graduate isn't too bad. I dread thinking about the future though. Whenever I try to plan ahead, I am haunted by fears of long-term unemployment. What if I'm doomed to be broke for life? Right now, the future looks like this: no job, no income, no car, no house, nothing.
I feel so unmotivated to go into my internship place every morning because it just further reminds me that I don't have a "real" job. And not just any "real" job, but a good job that I would like. But alas, beggars can't be choosers. In this economy, beggars get nothing to choose from at all.
What next?
I have no clue what I want to be, what I hope to accomplish in life, where I see myself in the future, where I see myself in ten years, or anything along those lines. I'm sick of answering those types of questions. What I really want is this: a job, a source of income (a.k.a. a job).
That said, I need to decide what to do once my internship ends. Here are my options:
A. Continue looking for a job. 'Cause that has obviously worked out wonderfully for me! Granted, I've mostly given up lately. It might not be a bad idea to spam job boards with hundreds of applications again. This probably won't lead anywhere though. Sadly, no one on those job sites are seeking entry-level candidates with no full-time work experience. Hahaha.
B. Apply to grad school. Grad school can certainly open up doors, especially for the never-employed like me who have no doors to begin with. Cost: $40-50k!, not including living expenses and books. I hate the idea of taking on so much debt, and possibly still ending up unemployed. Another concern: what if I fail? I've heard so many things about how difficult grading in grad school can be. If I end up with a low GPA in grad school, I'll probably be permanently unemployed. In addition, it will take a whole year before I can attend grad school, assuming I start preparing my application materials right away. I would need to study for the GRE/GMAT, and then actually do well on it. This alone could take months.
I think I want to go to grad school for accounting, even though I have no experience in accounting. Isn't it supposed to be recession-proof? Or at least as recession-proof as most industries these days. This sounds like it could be a mistake, but once upon a time I was actually good at math. Also, I had taken two introductory accounting classes in college, one of which I found confusing, difficult, and boring (B+ as my final grade, after a very generous curve). I had left the final exam room for that class feeling nauseous and worried that I had failed (final exam grade: 73%). My second accounting course was a relatively interesting one in which all the material made a lot of sense to me (A as my final grade). Both were equally quantitative, surprisingly.
C. Continue taking classes. This might be the most reasonable option. I have been taking classes for the past few months. If I continue, I can complete a graduate degree within a year. Unfortunately, this degree would only prepare me for a government job (if they are still hiring by the time I graduate). Also, I find the major to be very boring. Continuing with the classes is going to cost a decent amount of money too. But if I don't take any more classes, I would never have the chance to get this degree again.
So, what do you think?
I can't decide between A, B, or C. Grad school seems promising, but only if I ace everything and land my dream entry-level job right after graduation. Everything is so uninteresting. Classes, job-hunting, interning, temping, working--it's all tedious and boring.
But first: unemployment is so lonely and isolating. I feel like it ruined parts of my life that had once been promising, if not perfect. Everything feels so foreign and out of place now that I sometimes feel like I'm dreaming (and not in a good way).
1. Social Life
After moving back with my parents, I was hundreds of miles away from most of my friends. And thus, my social life came to a screeching halt. Not that it was great before--it has been withering since I graduated from college early. But the several months before I graduated from college were utterly amazing. I had several best/close friends at that point, and there was always something fun to do. Unfortunately, I decided to not keep in contact with most of my friends after graduation because I was ashamed about still being unemployed. I figured I would get a job, move back, and everything will go back to being good again. That was over a year ago. Sigh. Now that I've moved out of my parents' house to take on an internship in the middle of nowhere, I have absolutely no one to talk to outside of my internship hours. And I have nothing in common with my college friends anymore. They have all moved on to fancy jobs and the real world. Meanwhile, I'm stuck in unemployment-limbo and have decided that self-imposed isolation is preferable to facing feelings of regret and shame.
2. Family
My parents sometimes treat me like I'm a good-for-nothing freeloader. They are really embarrassed by my being unemployed, so I don't bother going anywhere in public with them. We used to get along, but this unemployment problem has ruined whatever semblance of a relationship we had. My parents are pretty temperamental, and I'll never forgive them for the various insults they've hurled at me over the past several months. And this is all because I couldn't find a job.
3. Financially
The transition from being a broke college student to a broke, unemployed college graduate isn't too bad. I dread thinking about the future though. Whenever I try to plan ahead, I am haunted by fears of long-term unemployment. What if I'm doomed to be broke for life? Right now, the future looks like this: no job, no income, no car, no house, nothing.
I feel so unmotivated to go into my internship place every morning because it just further reminds me that I don't have a "real" job. And not just any "real" job, but a good job that I would like. But alas, beggars can't be choosers. In this economy, beggars get nothing to choose from at all.
What next?
I have no clue what I want to be, what I hope to accomplish in life, where I see myself in the future, where I see myself in ten years, or anything along those lines. I'm sick of answering those types of questions. What I really want is this: a job, a source of income (a.k.a. a job).
That said, I need to decide what to do once my internship ends. Here are my options:
A. Continue looking for a job. 'Cause that has obviously worked out wonderfully for me! Granted, I've mostly given up lately. It might not be a bad idea to spam job boards with hundreds of applications again. This probably won't lead anywhere though. Sadly, no one on those job sites are seeking entry-level candidates with no full-time work experience. Hahaha.
B. Apply to grad school. Grad school can certainly open up doors, especially for the never-employed like me who have no doors to begin with. Cost: $40-50k!, not including living expenses and books. I hate the idea of taking on so much debt, and possibly still ending up unemployed. Another concern: what if I fail? I've heard so many things about how difficult grading in grad school can be. If I end up with a low GPA in grad school, I'll probably be permanently unemployed. In addition, it will take a whole year before I can attend grad school, assuming I start preparing my application materials right away. I would need to study for the GRE/GMAT, and then actually do well on it. This alone could take months.
I think I want to go to grad school for accounting, even though I have no experience in accounting. Isn't it supposed to be recession-proof? Or at least as recession-proof as most industries these days. This sounds like it could be a mistake, but once upon a time I was actually good at math. Also, I had taken two introductory accounting classes in college, one of which I found confusing, difficult, and boring (B+ as my final grade, after a very generous curve). I had left the final exam room for that class feeling nauseous and worried that I had failed (final exam grade: 73%). My second accounting course was a relatively interesting one in which all the material made a lot of sense to me (A as my final grade). Both were equally quantitative, surprisingly.
C. Continue taking classes. This might be the most reasonable option. I have been taking classes for the past few months. If I continue, I can complete a graduate degree within a year. Unfortunately, this degree would only prepare me for a government job (if they are still hiring by the time I graduate). Also, I find the major to be very boring. Continuing with the classes is going to cost a decent amount of money too. But if I don't take any more classes, I would never have the chance to get this degree again.
So, what do you think?
I can't decide between A, B, or C. Grad school seems promising, but only if I ace everything and land my dream entry-level job right after graduation. Everything is so uninteresting. Classes, job-hunting, interning, temping, working--it's all tedious and boring.
Friday, June 18, 2010
Nightmare
Not that anyone follows this blog anyhow, but I think this will be my last post. Dwelling on my lack of employment has proved itself to be very depressing.
I wish I could just beg someone and be like, "Save me! Please?" All it takes is one job to potentially change a person's life. And all it takes is one person, out of the millions who have the authority, to influence a job offer.
I really wish someone would save me from my unemployment. I'm not entitled, just desperate. I have good grades, an amazing SAT score, great work ethic, and several internships under my belt. I graduated within the top 5% of my high school class, went to a pretigious college on a moderate scholarship, graduated from college with honors and a year ahead of schedule, and held temporary positions at some of the largest, most renowned corporations in the world. I have even completed some graduate coursework. But none of this matters because I'm unemployed and can't manage to find full-time employment.
*EDITED*
Originally, I had a cheesy story posted here about a dream (nightmare) I had back in freshman year of college. It's sappy and ridiculous so I decided to remove it from this blog. In the dream, all of my college friends ended up as big-time bankers/executives several years after graduation. I was unemployed, broke, and homeless. They all married each other (LOL) and decided to take pity on me and hire me as their housekeeper / charity case. That dream (premonition?) should have driven me to at least double major in finance and marketing. But instead, it only encouraged me to graduate earlier, while only pursuing a single major in marketing. (Minor in art, a.k.a. underwater basket-weaving.)
So now almost all of my closest friends are going to work for banks while I'm living with my parents and doing my 4th or 5th internship. I don't even have enough work experience to get hired as a secretary/assistant. And this is with me having a slightly better GPA than most of the people I knew (only because marketing was an easier major), and graduating a year earlier so I could get a head start on the job hunt. I should've known that employers shun unemployed graduates but love to recruit on campus. In conclusion, my friends are great and worked hard for everything, instead of trying to take the easy way out like I did. I'm really glad that they made it, and proved all of the gloomy unemployment statistics for our generation wrong. I definitely should've listened to them that this was a bad idea, instead of trying to race to the graduation finish line. (Won the battle, lost the war?)
Was this the co$tlie$t mistake I've ever made? Yep. I didn't even get to graduate/celebrate with my own class.
I wish I could just beg someone and be like, "Save me! Please?" All it takes is one job to potentially change a person's life. And all it takes is one person, out of the millions who have the authority, to influence a job offer.
I really wish someone would save me from my unemployment. I'm not entitled, just desperate. I have good grades, an amazing SAT score, great work ethic, and several internships under my belt. I graduated within the top 5% of my high school class, went to a pretigious college on a moderate scholarship, graduated from college with honors and a year ahead of schedule, and held temporary positions at some of the largest, most renowned corporations in the world. I have even completed some graduate coursework. But none of this matters because I'm unemployed and can't manage to find full-time employment.
*EDITED*
Originally, I had a cheesy story posted here about a dream (nightmare) I had back in freshman year of college. It's sappy and ridiculous so I decided to remove it from this blog. In the dream, all of my college friends ended up as big-time bankers/executives several years after graduation. I was unemployed, broke, and homeless. They all married each other (LOL) and decided to take pity on me and hire me as their housekeeper / charity case. That dream (premonition?) should have driven me to at least double major in finance and marketing. But instead, it only encouraged me to graduate earlier, while only pursuing a single major in marketing. (Minor in art, a.k.a. underwater basket-weaving.)
So now almost all of my closest friends are going to work for banks while I'm living with my parents and doing my 4th or 5th internship. I don't even have enough work experience to get hired as a secretary/assistant. And this is with me having a slightly better GPA than most of the people I knew (only because marketing was an easier major), and graduating a year earlier so I could get a head start on the job hunt. I should've known that employers shun unemployed graduates but love to recruit on campus. In conclusion, my friends are great and worked hard for everything, instead of trying to take the easy way out like I did. I'm really glad that they made it, and proved all of the gloomy unemployment statistics for our generation wrong. I definitely should've listened to them that this was a bad idea, instead of trying to race to the graduation finish line. (Won the battle, lost the war?)
Was this the co$tlie$t mistake I've ever made? Yep. I didn't even get to graduate/celebrate with my own class.
Diary of Despair and Unemployment
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worldnews/asia/china/5907430/Chinese-students-diary-of-despair.html
Chinese student's diary of despair
Published: 9:00PM BST 25 Jul 2009
This is such a sad story. She was probably the same age as me. Her family had sacrificed so incredibly much to send her to college; the pressure to succeed must have been unbearable.
Chinese student's diary of despair
Published: 9:00PM BST 25 Jul 2009
Unable to find a job and consumed with guilt about her parents' financial sacrifices, Chinese student Liu Wei took her own life. Her diary charts a voyage from hope to despair.
November 2006
"At school, I had a scholarship but now my family has to pay for me to study. I have to pay them back and I have to give money to my brother so he can build a house. My goal is to study hard, get a good job and provide for my family. If I cannot do that, then it is impossible to say that I have a good life."
May 2008
"I cannot believe it is so difficult to find a part-time job; there were 200 students applying for one part-time job as a receptionist. I cannot imagine what will happen when I graduate."
October 9, 2008
"I am a college student but I cannot find a job. How ashamed will I be when I have to go back to the village after I graduate? I feel so tired, I want to keep sleeping and never wake up. What shall I do? Who can save me? Apart from my parents, I will not miss anything in this world."
October 18, 2008 (final diary entry)
"Why so difficult?"
This is such a sad story. She was probably the same age as me. Her family had sacrificed so incredibly much to send her to college; the pressure to succeed must have been unbearable.
Tuesday, June 8, 2010
How to fake employment
Don't be embarrassed to admit that you're unemployed. After all, you're definitely in good company.
But just in case someone asks you that dreaded, "So, what do you do?" question, here are several helpful ways you can fake employment:
1. Volunteering. Once you are officially a "Volunteer", you can start reclaiming your identity and picking up the pieces of your battered ego. And you now have a purpose in life other than couch/channel-surfing all day. Best of all, by volunteering for a good cause, you are (hopefully) contributing to society and making the world a better place, one day of unemployment at a time.
2.Negatively paid Unpaid internship. Prestigious unpaid internships are actually very competitive and hard to land these day. But have no fear: you can easily buy your way into an unpaid internship at a national, Fortune 500 company. A 10-15 week internship in the industry of your choice will cost you around 4 figures, including living expenses. If nothing else, you should get at least get a big name added to your resume. Sadly, I was one of those lost souls desperate enough to pay for an internship. (#1 from the previous post addresses this.) Email me for more details.
3. Classes. Take classes at a local college or university. You know the drill already (register, pay tuition and fee$, show up to class).
4. Part-time/temp job. Congrats! With a part-time/temp job, you are no longer unemployed. (Even if it doesn't feel like it because of your minimum-wage earnings and enormous amount of $tudent loan$.)
I've tried all but one of the above suggestions. Unfortunately, none of my opportunities led to a full-time job. Sigh.
I intentionally left off PAID internships from the list. Paid internships are great; they are generally your best bet for getting a full-time offer. As a paid intern, you are officially an employee of the firm. Other people will actually try to teach you things and help you learn, grow, and succeed. Paid interns usually have a much better chance of being hired by the company than temps do. Many interns get hired after 10 weeks, but temps can slave away for years before officially being invited to join the company.
When you are a temp: 1) the firm emphasizes repeatedly that you are NOT one of their employees, and 2) all the extremely tedious filing/data-entry tasks that no one else wants to do (not even the secretaries) gets pushed onto you. Obviously, some temps get to do more than just filing and data-entry. Or so I've heard.
But just in case someone asks you that dreaded, "So, what do you do?" question, here are several helpful ways you can fake employment:
1. Volunteering. Once you are officially a "Volunteer", you can start reclaiming your identity and picking up the pieces of your battered ego. And you now have a purpose in life other than couch/channel-surfing all day. Best of all, by volunteering for a good cause, you are (hopefully) contributing to society and making the world a better place, one day of unemployment at a time.
2.
3. Classes. Take classes at a local college or university. You know the drill already (register, pay tuition and fee$, show up to class).
4. Part-time/temp job. Congrats! With a part-time/temp job, you are no longer unemployed. (Even if it doesn't feel like it because of your minimum-wage earnings and enormous amount of $tudent loan$.)
I've tried all but one of the above suggestions. Unfortunately, none of my opportunities led to a full-time job. Sigh.
I intentionally left off PAID internships from the list. Paid internships are great; they are generally your best bet for getting a full-time offer. As a paid intern, you are officially an employee of the firm. Other people will actually try to teach you things and help you learn, grow, and succeed. Paid interns usually have a much better chance of being hired by the company than temps do. Many interns get hired after 10 weeks, but temps can slave away for years before officially being invited to join the company.
When you are a temp: 1) the firm emphasizes repeatedly that you are NOT one of their employees, and 2) all the extremely tedious filing/data-entry tasks that no one else wants to do (not even the secretaries) gets pushed onto you. Obviously, some temps get to do more than just filing and data-entry. Or so I've heard.
The 5 Stages of Unemployment Grief
*All of the examples below are from personal experience (and for the most part, thoughts that occurred to me on a daily basis over the past week). Thankfully, #1 does not apply anymore.
1. Denial - "This unpaid internship was totally worth my $100k+ degree! I'm learning so incredibly much reading the latest Google News headlines 8 hours a day."
2. Anger - "The economy sucks! This is so not fair! And why do other people get cool jobs but not me? After all, I got to wear the nice little gold tassel thing at graduation, which means my GPA was higher... *pfffft* I. HATE. THIS."
3. Bargaining - "Maybe if I beg my alma mater, they will let me back in school. And then I can actually major in something useful..."
4. Depression - "Why is life so hard? I'm never going to get a job. Why me??"
5. Acceptance - N/A
1. Denial - "This unpaid internship was totally worth my $100k+ degree! I'm learning so incredibly much reading the latest Google News headlines 8 hours a day."
2. Anger - "The economy sucks! This is so not fair! And why do other people get cool jobs but not me? After all, I got to wear the nice little gold tassel thing at graduation, which means my GPA was higher... *pfffft* I. HATE. THIS."
3. Bargaining - "Maybe if I beg my alma mater, they will let me back in school. And then I can actually major in something useful..."
4. Depression - "Why is life so hard? I'm never going to get a job. Why me??"
5. Acceptance - N/A
Monday, June 7, 2010
Sunday, June 6, 2010
Direct Your Destiny?
A multimedia campaign has been launched directing recent college grads to DirectYourDestiny.org. What could this be about? Are we finally seeing something come out of the government stimulus package?
Nope. Instead, our friends at the Graduate Management Admission Council want all us unemployed and underemployed college grads to register for the GMAT! According to their commercials, they understand our plights; they show us how much we want to get out of our minimum-wage, crap jobs (literally, cleaning out dirty stables).
Hmm... Are the number of test takers down? I wonder why people aren't rushing to take a $250 exam during a recession? Who in their right mind wouldn't want to spend another $100k on an MBA education during a recession?? You might as well throw in a $3,000 Kaplan GMAT course. The people at Kaplan called me daily for months before I finally answered and told them to stop calling my number.
I find it hilarious that one of the GMAC's target audiences are people watching MTV reruns. They forget that even MTV viewers know the value of an MBA is more or less zilch without relevant work experience. And we all know that business school graduates were hit hard by the recession.
But sign me up anyway for the GMAT the day the $250 includes the Kaplan course!
Nope. Instead, our friends at the Graduate Management Admission Council want all us unemployed and underemployed college grads to register for the GMAT! According to their commercials, they understand our plights; they show us how much we want to get out of our minimum-wage, crap jobs (literally, cleaning out dirty stables).
Hmm... Are the number of test takers down? I wonder why people aren't rushing to take a $250 exam during a recession? Who in their right mind wouldn't want to spend another $100k on an MBA education during a recession?? You might as well throw in a $3,000 Kaplan GMAT course. The people at Kaplan called me daily for months before I finally answered and told them to stop calling my number.
I find it hilarious that one of the GMAC's target audiences are people watching MTV reruns. They forget that even MTV viewers know the value of an MBA is more or less zilch without relevant work experience. And we all know that business school graduates were hit hard by the recession.
But sign me up anyway for the GMAT the day the $250 includes the Kaplan course!
Saturday, June 5, 2010
Still no jobs, except for Census takers
Surprise, surprise--the stock market is down again because there are no jobs! According to the latest employment reports, 431,000 jobs were added to the economy in May. However, this amount was much lower than expected, and Census hiring accounted for 96% of it. 96% of 431,000 = 411,000 Census jobs.
I wonder how many of the remaining 20,000 jobs added were temp positions??
My guess is that many full-time, "permanent" jobs were actually lost in May, and this loss was only slightly offset by the Census and temporary positions added. What happens when the Census tallying is over?
http://articles.moneycentral.msn.com/Investing/Dispatch/market-dispatches.aspx?post=1765590&_blg=1,1765590
I wonder how many of the remaining 20,000 jobs added were temp positions??
My guess is that many full-time, "permanent" jobs were actually lost in May, and this loss was only slightly offset by the Census and temporary positions added. What happens when the Census tallying is over?
http://articles.moneycentral.msn.com/Investing/Dispatch/market-dispatches.aspx?post=1765590&_blg=1,1765590
Thursday, June 3, 2010
Law school student sells grad tickets to pay student loans
New York Law School Student Trying to Scalp Graduation Tickets
http://abovethelaw.com/2010/05/new-york-law-schools-student-trying-to-scalp-graduation-tickets/new-york-law-school-graduation/
"COME SEE 300 OR SO UNEMPLOYED LAW GRADS SWEAT OUT PAYING BACK THEIR LAW SCHOOL LOANS!"
"(All proceeds will go to help one student make his first loan payment.)"
Well, hopefully someone bought these tickets. I actually want one. (I love graduation speeches.) Maybe next year?
Wednesday, June 2, 2010
Valedictorian says key to 7.62 GPA was time management
A 7.62 GPA (grade point average)! This is utterly and completely ridiculous!
Gaither's valedictorian says key to 7.62 GPA was time management
"When Hillsborough County's high school graduates cross the stage to get their diplomas, there will be some pretty impressive GPAs announced.
[A student] of Durant High School has a 7.83.
[A student] of Blake has a 7.76.
[A student] from Durant has a 7.64.
And then there's [the student] from Gaither with a 7.62.
They are the four highest in the county.
"Of course, studying came first," [the valedictorian] said about getting the high marks."
That's a 7.83 out of 4.0 in case you're wondering. I pity those lazy underachievers with their 4.0s... Seriously, what the heck?! I'm sure these were all exceptionally smart and hard-working students. By no means am I trying to downplay their amazing accomplishments. They should feel proud of themselves because they definitely must have done something right to earn the highest grade point averages in their county.
However, how on Earth can a school district start out with a 4.0 grading scale and end up with students "earning" above 7 GPA's? I'm sure there were dozens, maybe even hundreds, of students in that county with ridiculously inflated GPA's. The author of the article fails to attempts to explain how a 7 out of 4.0 is possible:
"An A in an honors class nets a student a 4.04. In a traditional class it's a 4.0. In advanced placement and dual enrollment classes, an A is a 4.08."My first impulse is to accuse these school officials of being unable to perform basic, elementary arithmetic; they clearly don't understand what an average is, ya kno', as in grade point average? They obviously average the grades from regular classes out of 4.0. Then add this to the sum of everything after the decimal point for the honors/AP classes divided by 3.86740331 (literally, I did the math). Still, how could one student take 32 honors and AP classes within 4 years? Most high school students take 7 classes a year (maybe 8 if they skip lunch). Plus, this student had 7 dual enrollment classes. Does dual enrollment that mean double the GPA? So an A would be an 8.0? Yippee! I'm also assuming there were a bunch of classes like Honors Bask-weaving 1 and AP Aerobics for the students to fulfill their core requirements.
Again, I have to wonder what the people running this school district are thinking. The whole point of a GPA is to have a relatively standardized system of evaluating and measuring the performance of students across the country. How could an artificially inflated GPA be meaningful to anyone?
The author himself raises this question:
"But what happens when students apply to colleges and universities? When a student with an unweighted 4.0 applies next to a student with a weighted 7.0, who gets the nod from admissions first?"
Without a doubt, the school district officials are intentionally inflating their students' grade point averages. Is it to show off these impressive grades to colleges? To get publicity for their students and school district? And the most important question of all, should school officials be punished for academic dishonesty?
Don't forget that one valedictorian's remark, "Of course, studying came first", when addressing her high marks. Sweetie, keep on telling yourself that you earned every bit of your 7.62 out of 4.0 (or 190.5%)!! ;) (Congrats on Georgetown, BTW.)
[FYI, you can memorize entire lectures and textbooks, and the highest GPA you could possibly get in 99.9% of school districts across America is around a 4.8. That's with honors and AP classes being weighted at 5.0 for A's. Remember kids, gym and art class don't count as honors.]
Sunday, May 30, 2010
Experienced MIT Grad for Hire
Unemployed Banker And MIT Graduate Peddles On The Street For Job
"Joshua Persky, an unemployed financial engineer, stands in front of the Charles Schwab building at 50th Street and Park Avenue with a sign proclaiming "Experienced MIT Graduate for Hire" June 24, 2008 in New York City. Persky, who lost his job in the volatile banking industry six months ago, thought standing on a corner passing out resumes would be a novel approach over networking and writing emails at home. Persky is married and supports five children."
(June 24, 2008 - Photo by Spencer Platt/Getty Images North America)
UPDATE: Even though this story was from 2008, Persky eventually did get a job, before being laid off 5 months later.
Looks like the economy isn't picking up anytime soon. Hmm... maybe I should have taken up those insurance sales offers...
Life sucks.
Parents taking over their kids' job hunt
Parents go overboard to help college kid get job
Some apply for positions for adult child, stick nose in salary negotiations
By Eve Tahmincioglu
Some apply for positions for adult child, stick nose in salary negotiations
By Eve Tahmincioglu
msnbc.com contributor
updated 9:40 a.m. ET, Mon., May 24, 2010
Salary negotiation with candidate’s mom
Some parents also are sticking their noses into the salary negotiation process.
Late last year, Lisa Fedrizzi-Hutchins, a hiring manager for an environmental company in New York, made a job offer to an entry-level candidate and asked her to review it and call if she had any questions.
“The following day, I received a phone call from her mother because she felt her negotiation skills were far better than her daughter,” Fedrizzi-Hutchins recalled. “She had explained to me that the salary was far too low for her daughter to live comfortable in New York City and wanted to know what we needed to do to bring her salary up.”
The mom also asked for four weeks of vacation, above the standard two weeks' vacation for employees starting out.
Suddenly Fedrizzi-Hutchins found herself doing salary negotiations with the job candidate’s mother.
“The mother was not very happy with how our conversation ended, and sadly, her daughter did not accept the position with our company,” she said.
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